Supposedly we have a “Do Not Call” list, and if you sign up to be on it telemarketers aren’t supposed to call you. T’yeah, like it matters. My wife laughs at me sometimes because I’ll actually sit and talk to the people then try to sell them insurance or something else like some another phone service.     True story.

Here are some fool proof ways of ridding yourself of those pesky telemarketers:

  1. Try acting like a religious zealot and busily set yourself to trying to convert the telemarketer your new religious cult. Make sure your cult somehow involves wearing Earth shoes and a sherpa guides hat. That should definitely send them scurrying.
  2.  Pretending to be hard of hearing can often send the phone solicitor on their way. Try screaming “Ehhhhhh?” at the top of your lungs every time they ask you a question. If the deaf angle seems too obvious try pretending to have amnesia. First agree to buy whatever product they are selling. Then when they ask for your credit card number, ask them why they want it as if you have absolutely no clue what they are talking about. Do this repeatedly.
  3. Another suggestion is to pretend to listen intently to their sale pitch, whatever it may be. Go through the process of signing up for anything and everything possible. When the telemarketer finally tells you what you owe and asks you for your credit card number, explain that you’re a little hard up for cash. Then try to borrow money from the telemarketer. Promise over and over that you’re good for the money. This will surely put you on their ‘do not call’ list.

 

Billy